Whiskey Tango Foxtrot?!
What the hell is going on any more? Why is everyone I am in contact with being diagnosed with major and/or rare medical disorders?
My daughter has something called pseudohypoaldosteronism. And some unnamed sleep disorder. And maybe autism. Sort of. They don't even know. They just throw up their hands and say developmental delay. Next patient! Next door: 8-year-old with autism. Two doors down: 14-year-old with cancer. My mom had a bout with lung cancer last year. My cousin (er, step-cousin? One of those relatives by marriage that we see around holidays and family gatherings) has multiple kinds of cancer. So did her brother. One of my closest friends has been diagnosed with pseudo tumor cerebri (during pregnancy, no less!). Half the women I know have thyroid problems. Then there's a couple people with celiac, extreme food allergies, more cancer, more sleep disorders... Even our male cat is on canine birth control pills - for a skin condition!! WTF, man?
I don't want to make light of it too much, because some of these problems have huge impacts on people's lives. But the phrase "thoughts and prayers" keeps coming up all too often, and I don't understand why there's so much of this happening any more.
Did the previous generations have all these problems and just not know it? Has the medical field just lost the ability to make people healthy? Do all the tools and technologies just give them so much information that they get in over their heads? Has the cumbersome health care system addled their brains? Do they even know what they're doing at this point? I want answers!
I half expect to go into the doctor's office and have my physician tell me, "Well, it looks like you've got, um, pseudo...thala...druidinoidism. But it might be, uhh, hyper-cranial..... octopi...? Hell, I don't know. Tell you what - try some of this Florephidol. I've got free samples. If that doesn't work, I'll write you a prescription for some Zaloxodil. It says the side effects include intense dreams and euphoria. Can't go wrong with that, eh? What's wrong?... You wanna take a swig of scotch from my flask here?"